First off, I applaud you, intelligent reader for figuring out that this is a strange way to start off a blog, but it's something I was thinking about today. So, t.A.T.u. say they're straight...or they don't...or well they're not straight but they're not lesbians, or well they're "love as thou wilt" but they both have boyfriends but in any case one of them has two frickin kids.
Does any of this remind you of Ricky Martin's refusal to say anything about his sexual orientation supposedly because "it should be about the music" but really because if men think you're gay and women think you're straight you make a shitload more money? Perhaps that isn't why he does it...I don't know the man personally, but I think in t.A.T.u.'s case the lesbian image worked for them. Plenty of people have heard "All The Things She Said," and watched the girls get their blouses soaked, but who bothers with "Yugoslavia?" No one.
Other t.A.T.u. fans get on my case all the time about how I should respect them as artists and stop wondering if they're gay. I don't really wonder. I don't really care. It just puzzles me that they were supposedly aiming for this "man eating heterosexual" image with Dangerous and Moving, while pictures of them straddling, grabbing boobies, and making out still circulate the internet (and I'm helping this I know). The above is an old picture, but the picture to the right doesn't do much to rid my imagination of the notion that Lena (my early teen year girl crush) could still be gay.
That right there is the pitiful thing. For some people, t.A.T.u. was Ivan Shapovalov's desperate cry for attention. I mean, for chrissake these were UNDERAGE GIRLS. MAKING OUT. OH MY GOD. I was fourteen when I saw their first video, and I remember thinking, "They're really pretty. Lesbians can be pretty."
The notion was rather peculiar to me at the time. I grew up with an image of lesbians as these mulleted Eddie Bauer wearing man haters who didn't shave their legs. I was kind of iffy about boys but there was no way in hell I could ever fit the butch persona I thought all lesbians had to embody. I thought, "Wow what a great thing they're doing for young lesbians. If I were a young lesbian I would have such a crush on Lena. But I'm not."
Funny closet moment aside, I noticed that most of my friends who had their CD were guys. It has never failed to confuse me what some men find hot about lesbians aka: two women they can never and will never get. It was after Yulia got pregnant that I figured it out. The media (and yes I hate to use this evil gloomy meaningless word) portrays lesbians as very accessible to men. For some reason, the idea of a woman who doesn't want or need a penis AT ALL scares all hell out of our culture. 99% of the lesbian porn I've seen has had the most unenthusiastic women possible, usually approaching pussy like the mystery loaf your grandma makes that you sweetly pretend to like, and often these videos even have lesbians giving head to realistic dildos (and with a lot more enthusiasm than they eat pussy with).
You'd think as much as preppy straight girls annoy me it would be gratifying to see them together in a sexual manner. Actually quite the contrary. It annoys me to no end that not liking men is marketed as an aphrodisiac for men. By naturally opting out of male/female sexuality, I'm almost more of a target for it. Don't get me wrong, this is in no way an attack against men or anyone, but lesbians really need to do a better job of claiming their place in the world.
I most strongly support actors/artists/writers/other famous people who own their unique sexual identity not as a lure for fans, but just as a proud statement of who they are. Plenty of lesbians listen to t.A.T.u. (and I'm among them) but there are real lesbians (however hard it is to find them) recording songs, painting pictures, writing novels, playing sports, doing whatever it is you want to do. I'm currently rather enamored with Alex Parks. She's a singer, she does a lot of covers but her original music is pretty good. She's closer to my age than Melissa Ethridge, Ani DiFranco, or the Indigo Girls, she's talented, and she's pretty cute.
Just like with straight people, a lesbian's life isn't all about sex. We know Alex Parks is a lesbian because she just IS. Not because she plays tonsil hockey with other girls for cameras. I admit I love t.A.T.u. and their music, but it's nice for me to see people in the public eye (even if Alex Parks isn't on TRL too often) not letting their sexuality, gay straight or whatever else, dominate their image. Alex is a musician and a lesbian, not a lesbian and a musician. Moreover though, I love her because she's somewhat boyish without being butch (I guess futch is the word if you follow Tila Tequila and Dani, which I try not to), but her songs have a sensitivity to them that makes you think, "God I wish I were the girl that song was for." She could win many dames by surprising them with song I do believe. Oddly enough, as much of a perve as I am, that image makes me happier than straight chicks making out.
